Today, I went through Rice Village, trying to sell ads.
For a lot of those places, the owner of manager wasn't there, so I just left the ad contracts and a copy of the magazine. They told me they'd have the owners look at them. I'm not sure if that really means anything, but one person looked like she actually wanted to buy an ad.
*Sigh*
I just hope someone buys an ad....
Ad sales suck.They really, really suck.
I really, really hope someone buys one...... *sigh*
And when I started talking to them, I got all peppy and happy almost on reflex. It's awful.
___________________
In PE, we only ever do these stupid exercises. We really should get a lot of time to ourselves, but they take an hour to take role and they don't allow us to get out of our lines until we're done everything.
First is stretches, and then we have to run a certain way from one end of the gym to the other. One of them is called "karaoke", only they call it "carry-okie" Where the heck to do you get "ree" from "ra" anyway?
Anyway, you run sideways, stepping in front of one foot, and then stepping behind, and then to the side, and then in front, etc, etc. It's really simple, but most of my PE class seems unable to do it. And then one girl said "that shit is dangerous!"
How the hell is that dangerous? Maybe what's more dangerous is you lack of balance.
__________
In English, we did that DEAR thing. Drop Everything And Read.
But first, we went to the library to learn about the Personal Project.
It's a project all 10th graders have to do. It's supposed to be really big, only it seems to be pretty simple and pointless.
And I'm wondering if it's something you have to do a lot of research for.
It says you can do creative writing. I just want to write something. The story ideas I want to do, I've been thinking about for a while, and I won't really need to do much research.
I've narrowed it down to three.
A war story, about a revolution.
An episodic sci-fi comedy.
a series of short stories. Just cuz there are titles I want to use to a short story. Or just anything. A few I want to use are Footsteps on the Moon, Footsteps Dancing Under the Ocean and A Sea that Tastes like Tears. If I do the series of short stories, it'll probably be a series of short stories and manga one-shots. Even though I say series, they really won't be related.
Anyway, because we had to go to the library, we only had thirty minutes to read. I asked the teacher if I could read a philosophical essay instead of a novel. When she first explained it, she said it had to be a novel. And she gave me this weird, wide-eyed look.
Sensei: Philosophical...?
Me: Yeah!
Sensei:Sure... if that's what you want to read for forty-five minutes....
Me: Yes!
Sensei: Okay...
She probably thought me odd.
If you want to know, the book is Being and Nothingness by Jean-Paul Sartre. I'm starting to think all French philosophers like the word "absurd." Actually, I'm starting to like it. I hated it, but I'm starting to liked it.
It's a really difficult book. In 30 minutes, guess how many pages I read.
8.
8 pages.
It's a really difficult book.
But I like it.
And it's about things I think about a lot.
I feel like Sartre could have worded it more simply. He has this... pompous style, and he just assumes that you've read a million other philosophical works. Which you should have, if you're trying to read this book...
But still.
13 September 2010
11 September 2010
Big Happy Family
Actually, my family's not that big. Just the four of us. My parents, my brother and me.
My parents and I went to buy a printer/scanner. My brother hates going out, so he stayed at home to play games.
My father and I were waiting in the car while my mother was in La Madaleine to get coffee. He said to me that he hated arguing with her, so whenever it dragged on for a while, he'd just say "Yeah, whatever, whatever you want."
I told him that sounded insensitive, and he didn't respond.
"I really want to live in a house," he said.
"You're going to buy one once Jonny and I are gone, aren't you?"
"But that'll be too big... I guess we could buy a small house in Canada. That'd be nice.
"Or we could rent out the room to someone. It's a good investment, buying a house with several rooms near a college and renting them out. And I could hire a property manager, so I wouldn't have to deal with them."
I chuckle at his last sentence.
And then I kind of realized.
I'm not sure if we're all really happy.
I can't say we're miserable.
We're not happy, but we're not miserable either. We don't take no news as good news and go on with our lives. We dwell on things. We don't act much like a family, either. We act more like four people, perhaps a bit like-minded, perhaps a bit too similar, perhaps enough for patterns to emerge to the casual viewer. We don't act like much of a family. We act more like four people put into the same house, who agreed to cooperate and stay together until better arrangements could be met. Until my brother and I go off to college, we all decide to just get along, be affectionate enough, be detached enough.
We never really did the whole "one big happy family" thing. We're pretty detached from our relatives. We talk to my grandparents on my father's side once a week, my mother talks to hers often, etc, etc. We do have those connections, but I don't feel like we're all very much involved. We don't even act very Korean. We don't act very Canadian or very American, either. It'd be enough to throw me into an identity crisis if I gave a damn.
Kinda like that "what are friends, anyway?" phase I went through at the beginning of ninth grade, now that it's the beginning of 10th grade, I wonder, what is family? Really. Yeah, we're all related, and we're alike. We're really just people who happen to be of the same blood. I think all four of us realize that. I wonder if we're closer because of that. I'll talk about whatever in front of my parents. I'll be completely honest and fool around and just lay myself bare. Not literally, of course.
I feel so close to my family, and yet so detached.
But don't most people feel pretty detached from their family, anyway? From what I hear from my friends, "family bond" don't seem to be very strong here.
I don't know, I'm just feeling very sentimental today.
__________________________
I want to know how my parents looked when they were kids. I look very much like my mother. I bet she was pretty cute when she was a kid. She was really small, so she looked like she was 8 when she was 12. My dad told me he was cute when he was a kid, too. He said that he'd been told by many people that he looked like a girl. I wanna see!!!
And my mother's brother was very pretty, too. You wouldn't be able to tell nowadays, though. He's already balding. He's been balding. And he's only in his mid-40s. My brother's probably prettier than I am. I'm cute, he's pretty. That's how it is. My mother went through that as well. HIstory repeats itself, right?
I asked my dad how his siblings looked (he has an older sister and older brother. Both my parents were the youngest in their families, so I get little sympathy for my pains from being the elder.) and he said he doesn't remember. He doesn't even remember how he looked, he only remembers being told he was pretty.
That's so like him.
I wonder if I'll be like that. I have a kid, he/she asks me what I looked like.
"Hmm... I dunno..."
"What do you mean, you don't know?!"
"I remember being told I was cute a lot... I hated it, but they kept saying it, so I was probably cute."
"Probably? Mom!"
"Whatever. Quit wasting time and do your homework."
Or something.
***************************************
My dad's a bit odd.
He's a physicist. A scientist. Yet he's also very philosophical. He thought about taking a philosophy major, but since a philosopher isn't considered a real job anymore, he decided to take physics.
I thought that one must be a bit of a romantic to be a philosopher nowadays. My dad asked why I thought so. I told him that philosophers always seem to say such pretty words.
He said they don't. "They're not artists."
And then I realized that it was really just me. I just saw beauty in those words. Philosophy was very tightly-knit with science back when it was considered a real job. Who knows, maybe philosophers themselves didn't even find beauty in their own words. Many of them said life has no meaning, nothing exists, there's no point to anything.
You'd have to be a bit... a lot of a romantic to find beauty in those kinds of words. And a certain type of romantic. Not very many people hear "life has no meaning" and think the concept particularly pretty.
I guess the real oddity is me.
My dad admitted that he and my mother are strange. And then he called me a different kind of strange.
I kind of understand that, but I wonder what kind of strange that is.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Yesterday, at the end of Business Information Management, otherwise known as BIM or, as on my schedule, BUS INFO (what, does that say... bus... info? Yes. My life's dream is to become a bus driver for a stupid school district like HISD.), since we weren't doing anything (this was also my 7th period, the period in which all that photographer (or lack of) crap happened), I decided to play a game. So I went to tetris.
I heard the girls beside me say "so asian..."
I can hear you, morons.
I really, really, really wanted to say that, but that would be rude, so I just thought it, and continued playing.
Yes, I'm Asian, but what does that have to do with playing tetris? I mean, yeah, Tetris was invented in Russia, which is in the Eurasian continent, but isn't Russia culturally more like Europe than Asia? My playing tetris has nothing to do with my "Asian-ness", right?
I like to think I'm good at tetris. I've gotten to level 14 about twice, and once, I got to level 15. It was very surprising, and perhaps the shock played a role in my losing... Of course, my mother's gotten to level 20-something, which I didn't even think existed. But my mother's always like that. My brother doesn't like games like tetris. I like Tetris because it's simple. Yeah, you need to think a little, but gameplay is very simple. My brother refuses to accept a game unless in involves killing or blowing things up. My father never really liked computer games, even as a boy. What kind of boy doesn't like computer games?
I also find this a bit ironic because my dad studied a lot of computer science. He likes computer, but not computer games? Whatever.
And he said he's never gotten to a level with double digits, and it made me feel a bit happy. Not happy, per se, but kinda proud of myself. Then again, my dad likes more strategy games. Thinking games. Who needs flashy lights and beeping sounds and buttons? I'm thinking.
We're all a bit odd, I think.
____________________________________
The apartments I live in offer brunch every couple weeks. It's either Chick-fil-A or French Corner, I think it's called.
My parents still call it "chick-fill-ah."
Anyway, today, they had tacos. It was lunch this time, not brunch.
But since we left to buy the printer/scanner at about lunch time, my bro got to eat tacos, and I DIDN'T!!
I wanted a taco.
No fair.
Of course, this is Texas.
I can go eat a taco whenever I want.
But it was free.
Free tacos.
*sigh*
Ah well.
I was so depressed yesterday, but I feel a bit better.
And my post actually kind of has a point!
Family, right? All...most... Almost all of what I said had to do with family! Bwahahaha!!!
I am probably a bit crazy right now, so let's leave it at that. :D
My parents and I went to buy a printer/scanner. My brother hates going out, so he stayed at home to play games.
My father and I were waiting in the car while my mother was in La Madaleine to get coffee. He said to me that he hated arguing with her, so whenever it dragged on for a while, he'd just say "Yeah, whatever, whatever you want."
I told him that sounded insensitive, and he didn't respond.
"I really want to live in a house," he said.
"You're going to buy one once Jonny and I are gone, aren't you?"
"But that'll be too big... I guess we could buy a small house in Canada. That'd be nice.
"Or we could rent out the room to someone. It's a good investment, buying a house with several rooms near a college and renting them out. And I could hire a property manager, so I wouldn't have to deal with them."
I chuckle at his last sentence.
And then I kind of realized.
I'm not sure if we're all really happy.
I can't say we're miserable.
We're not happy, but we're not miserable either. We don't take no news as good news and go on with our lives. We dwell on things. We don't act much like a family, either. We act more like four people, perhaps a bit like-minded, perhaps a bit too similar, perhaps enough for patterns to emerge to the casual viewer. We don't act like much of a family. We act more like four people put into the same house, who agreed to cooperate and stay together until better arrangements could be met. Until my brother and I go off to college, we all decide to just get along, be affectionate enough, be detached enough.
We never really did the whole "one big happy family" thing. We're pretty detached from our relatives. We talk to my grandparents on my father's side once a week, my mother talks to hers often, etc, etc. We do have those connections, but I don't feel like we're all very much involved. We don't even act very Korean. We don't act very Canadian or very American, either. It'd be enough to throw me into an identity crisis if I gave a damn.
Kinda like that "what are friends, anyway?" phase I went through at the beginning of ninth grade, now that it's the beginning of 10th grade, I wonder, what is family? Really. Yeah, we're all related, and we're alike. We're really just people who happen to be of the same blood. I think all four of us realize that. I wonder if we're closer because of that. I'll talk about whatever in front of my parents. I'll be completely honest and fool around and just lay myself bare. Not literally, of course.
I feel so close to my family, and yet so detached.
But don't most people feel pretty detached from their family, anyway? From what I hear from my friends, "family bond" don't seem to be very strong here.
I don't know, I'm just feeling very sentimental today.
__________________________
I want to know how my parents looked when they were kids. I look very much like my mother. I bet she was pretty cute when she was a kid. She was really small, so she looked like she was 8 when she was 12. My dad told me he was cute when he was a kid, too. He said that he'd been told by many people that he looked like a girl. I wanna see!!!
And my mother's brother was very pretty, too. You wouldn't be able to tell nowadays, though. He's already balding. He's been balding. And he's only in his mid-40s. My brother's probably prettier than I am. I'm cute, he's pretty. That's how it is. My mother went through that as well. HIstory repeats itself, right?
I asked my dad how his siblings looked (he has an older sister and older brother. Both my parents were the youngest in their families, so I get little sympathy for my pains from being the elder.) and he said he doesn't remember. He doesn't even remember how he looked, he only remembers being told he was pretty.
That's so like him.
I wonder if I'll be like that. I have a kid, he/she asks me what I looked like.
"Hmm... I dunno..."
"What do you mean, you don't know?!"
"I remember being told I was cute a lot... I hated it, but they kept saying it, so I was probably cute."
"Probably? Mom!"
"Whatever. Quit wasting time and do your homework."
Or something.
***************************************
My dad's a bit odd.
He's a physicist. A scientist. Yet he's also very philosophical. He thought about taking a philosophy major, but since a philosopher isn't considered a real job anymore, he decided to take physics.
I thought that one must be a bit of a romantic to be a philosopher nowadays. My dad asked why I thought so. I told him that philosophers always seem to say such pretty words.
He said they don't. "They're not artists."
And then I realized that it was really just me. I just saw beauty in those words. Philosophy was very tightly-knit with science back when it was considered a real job. Who knows, maybe philosophers themselves didn't even find beauty in their own words. Many of them said life has no meaning, nothing exists, there's no point to anything.
You'd have to be a bit... a lot of a romantic to find beauty in those kinds of words. And a certain type of romantic. Not very many people hear "life has no meaning" and think the concept particularly pretty.
I guess the real oddity is me.
My dad admitted that he and my mother are strange. And then he called me a different kind of strange.
I kind of understand that, but I wonder what kind of strange that is.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Yesterday, at the end of Business Information Management, otherwise known as BIM or, as on my schedule, BUS INFO (what, does that say... bus... info? Yes. My life's dream is to become a bus driver for a stupid school district like HISD.), since we weren't doing anything (this was also my 7th period, the period in which all that photographer (or lack of) crap happened), I decided to play a game. So I went to tetris.
I heard the girls beside me say "so asian..."
I can hear you, morons.
I really, really, really wanted to say that, but that would be rude, so I just thought it, and continued playing.
Yes, I'm Asian, but what does that have to do with playing tetris? I mean, yeah, Tetris was invented in Russia, which is in the Eurasian continent, but isn't Russia culturally more like Europe than Asia? My playing tetris has nothing to do with my "Asian-ness", right?
I like to think I'm good at tetris. I've gotten to level 14 about twice, and once, I got to level 15. It was very surprising, and perhaps the shock played a role in my losing... Of course, my mother's gotten to level 20-something, which I didn't even think existed. But my mother's always like that. My brother doesn't like games like tetris. I like Tetris because it's simple. Yeah, you need to think a little, but gameplay is very simple. My brother refuses to accept a game unless in involves killing or blowing things up. My father never really liked computer games, even as a boy. What kind of boy doesn't like computer games?
I also find this a bit ironic because my dad studied a lot of computer science. He likes computer, but not computer games? Whatever.
And he said he's never gotten to a level with double digits, and it made me feel a bit happy. Not happy, per se, but kinda proud of myself. Then again, my dad likes more strategy games. Thinking games. Who needs flashy lights and beeping sounds and buttons? I'm thinking.
We're all a bit odd, I think.
____________________________________
The apartments I live in offer brunch every couple weeks. It's either Chick-fil-A or French Corner, I think it's called.
My parents still call it "chick-fill-ah."
Anyway, today, they had tacos. It was lunch this time, not brunch.
But since we left to buy the printer/scanner at about lunch time, my bro got to eat tacos, and I DIDN'T!!
I wanted a taco.
No fair.
Of course, this is Texas.
I can go eat a taco whenever I want.
But it was free.
Free tacos.
*sigh*
Ah well.
I was so depressed yesterday, but I feel a bit better.
And my post actually kind of has a point!
Family, right? All...most... Almost all of what I said had to do with family! Bwahahaha!!!
I am probably a bit crazy right now, so let's leave it at that. :D
10 September 2010
Once man has flown...
I've had a very crappy week.
I haven't been blogging this week, but you really didn't miss much. But, I may as well write something, and I feel like ranting, so I can kill two stones with one bird (wait, that doesn't sound quite right...) and rant here. I will have written something, and I will have ranted to someone who may or may not care! If I were to say all this to my parents, they don't care. That's it. With you guys, even though I know you don't care about the tantrums of a 14-year-old, I can imagine that perhaps one of you actually cares enough to read. Thank you for being so ambiguous. (Not really. But it's useful for the moment, so, for the moment, THUMBS UP TO YA!!!)
Labour Day Weekend.
I was planning on doing my homework. I decided "You know what? Screw this." I only did two things.
And then I caught a cold.
Aah, this must be my punishment for procrastinating, I thought.
Tuesday, I was sick. The day sucked.
Wednesday, I was also sick. I was also supposed to take pictures for my article. I arranged to meet the photographer at D lunch by the west building. She didn't come. I tried texting her, and calling her, but the number didn't work. It turned out, she gave me the wrong number. The day sucked.
Yesterday. We did a seminar for English. Oh, joy! And she split us into two groups. One group answered questions, and the other took notes. But the questions I had good answers for were asked to the other group. And I was still sick. I have to make it up on Tuesday. Oh, joy. Oh, joy. Oh, joy.
Today. The photographer I was supposed to work with on Wednesday was busy, so she delegated the task to another photographer. She's photo editor, so she can do that. The photographer told me she'd text me which lunch we'd do the photos. At the beginning of 7th period, which is our lunch period, I texted her. Have you decided which lunch? No, not yet. I talk to my teacher. She tells me after we finish one assignment, I can go figure out what I'm supposed to do. I text her again after A-lunch is over. No answer. I wait. I text her again, also telling her where to meet me. No answer. I wonder if this means she is outside and waiting, but just didn't reply. I go outside. She's not there. I text her again. She tells me to text the photo editor. I do. "She wouldn't respond, and then she told me to text you. What do i do?"
She just said "she in trob." I ask again, "so, what do I do?" hoping the frantic tone playing in my head wouldn't be in the text. She told me to wait, and that the photographer was in trouble. "I'm outside right now. Should I just go back to class?" "Yes sweetheart" For some reason, this calmed me, and I went back to class. It was extremely stressful. I get a headache just thinking about it. Am I just cursed when it comes to working with other people?
So, that was my week. In a word, it sucked. Well, that was two words, but the important thing is that one word. (It?) No. Sucked. This week sucked. THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!! Or... whoever the hell's up there anyway. Or down there. Or way over there. Or whoever's hiding somewhere under a rock hoping I will not find him/Him/it/her and KILLL IT!!! I don't care, it is an it. An it that deserves to die. Go to Hell, God. Seriously. (Damn, I hope nothing happens to me)
D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D:
I hope none of those look like happy faces.
I was chatting with one of my friends, and after a while, it came to the subject of my HORRIBLE, UNFAIR, RIDICULOUS AND JUST I-WANNA-KILL-SOMEONE-ESQUE-THOUGHT-INDUCING schedule change. It turns out, Are-chan's class (she has my old teacher... the fun one... *sniff* and I got the teacher-ish teacher! It's ninth grade all over again!!! Only I DON'T HAVE A FRIEND IN THAT CLASS! You know, I did, for one class. But then she got switched out. HOW THE HELL DID THAT HAPPEN???) does not have to do seminar.
NO FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Previous English-sensei thinks that seminars are stupid and a waste of time. So they just needed to type the answers to the questions.
NO FAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD!! WHY DO YOU HATE ME? I'M A GOOD KID! EXCEPT FOR THE FACT THAT I DON'T THINK YOU EXIST!!!
It's not fair!
Of course, it went on to the
ARE THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED!!
ME But it wasn't in my control! They did it randomly!
ARE ASK TO CHANGE IT BACK!!!
ME It's been more than a week!!
Are D:> Then get your parents to go and complain!
ME But my parents don't even care. You don't have friends in your classes? Make new friends. There are things in life you can't control. As DaVinci said, Once man has flown, he will walk the earth with his eyes turned skyward, for there he has been, and there he will wish to return.
and then the conversation returned to normal.
Of course, I'm not sure if that quote is exact. I am fairly sure DaVinci said it, though.
But I think I can really identify with that quote. I lived in Canada, and then I came here. It kinda was like comparing flying to walking on the ground. And, well, it's not like I could walk around facing north all the time, but I thought about it a lot.
And now, whenever I pass my old English classroom (and it's my homeroom) I think if how, damnit, I used to have a friend in that class. And the teacher is funny. And really lax. No fair. Why do I have to suffer like this? I hate being alone. And it's so stressful. I have all this work, and lousy classmates, and no friend to vent to. I bet all my hair'll turn grey, I'll have to buy a wig.
And I kinda thought that "will walk the earth with his eyes turned skyward" part a bit sad.
So, he doesn't get to fly again? Is he cursed to walk on the ground forever, always thinking about that freedom and joy he tasted flying?
Then wouldn't it just be better to forget about it?
But then you'd be losing something precious to you...
But it's still nice to think about it.
I can't imagine anything being very "nice" if all it does is make you depressed.
Guah, all of a sudden, this became a bit depressing....
Anyway, yeah,
HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!
Look! It's a rainbow!
Anyway, let's all have a great weekend, and hopefully I will be able to sell ads!
I haven't been blogging this week, but you really didn't miss much. But, I may as well write something, and I feel like ranting, so I can kill two stones with one bird (wait, that doesn't sound quite right...) and rant here. I will have written something, and I will have ranted to someone who may or may not care! If I were to say all this to my parents, they don't care. That's it. With you guys, even though I know you don't care about the tantrums of a 14-year-old, I can imagine that perhaps one of you actually cares enough to read. Thank you for being so ambiguous. (Not really. But it's useful for the moment, so, for the moment, THUMBS UP TO YA!!!)
Labour Day Weekend.
I was planning on doing my homework. I decided "You know what? Screw this." I only did two things.
And then I caught a cold.
Aah, this must be my punishment for procrastinating, I thought.
Tuesday, I was sick. The day sucked.
Wednesday, I was also sick. I was also supposed to take pictures for my article. I arranged to meet the photographer at D lunch by the west building. She didn't come. I tried texting her, and calling her, but the number didn't work. It turned out, she gave me the wrong number. The day sucked.
Yesterday. We did a seminar for English. Oh, joy! And she split us into two groups. One group answered questions, and the other took notes. But the questions I had good answers for were asked to the other group. And I was still sick. I have to make it up on Tuesday. Oh, joy. Oh, joy. Oh, joy.
Today. The photographer I was supposed to work with on Wednesday was busy, so she delegated the task to another photographer. She's photo editor, so she can do that. The photographer told me she'd text me which lunch we'd do the photos. At the beginning of 7th period, which is our lunch period, I texted her. Have you decided which lunch? No, not yet. I talk to my teacher. She tells me after we finish one assignment, I can go figure out what I'm supposed to do. I text her again after A-lunch is over. No answer. I wait. I text her again, also telling her where to meet me. No answer. I wonder if this means she is outside and waiting, but just didn't reply. I go outside. She's not there. I text her again. She tells me to text the photo editor. I do. "She wouldn't respond, and then she told me to text you. What do i do?"
She just said "she in trob." I ask again, "so, what do I do?" hoping the frantic tone playing in my head wouldn't be in the text. She told me to wait, and that the photographer was in trouble. "I'm outside right now. Should I just go back to class?" "Yes sweetheart" For some reason, this calmed me, and I went back to class. It was extremely stressful. I get a headache just thinking about it. Am I just cursed when it comes to working with other people?
So, that was my week. In a word, it sucked. Well, that was two words, but the important thing is that one word. (It?) No. Sucked. This week sucked. THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!! Or... whoever the hell's up there anyway. Or down there. Or way over there. Or whoever's hiding somewhere under a rock hoping I will not find him/Him/it/her and KILLL IT!!! I don't care, it is an it. An it that deserves to die. Go to Hell, God. Seriously. (Damn, I hope nothing happens to me)
D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D: D:
I hope none of those look like happy faces.
I was chatting with one of my friends, and after a while, it came to the subject of my HORRIBLE, UNFAIR, RIDICULOUS AND JUST I-WANNA-KILL-SOMEONE-ESQUE-THOUGHT-INDUCING schedule change. It turns out, Are-chan's class (she has my old teacher... the fun one... *sniff* and I got the teacher-ish teacher! It's ninth grade all over again!!! Only I DON'T HAVE A FRIEND IN THAT CLASS! You know, I did, for one class. But then she got switched out. HOW THE HELL DID THAT HAPPEN???) does not have to do seminar.
NO FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Previous English-sensei thinks that seminars are stupid and a waste of time. So they just needed to type the answers to the questions.
NO FAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD!! WHY DO YOU HATE ME? I'M A GOOD KID! EXCEPT FOR THE FACT THAT I DON'T THINK YOU EXIST!!!
It's not fair!
Of course, it went on to the
ARE THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED!!
ME But it wasn't in my control! They did it randomly!
ARE ASK TO CHANGE IT BACK!!!
ME It's been more than a week!!
Are D:> Then get your parents to go and complain!
ME But my parents don't even care. You don't have friends in your classes? Make new friends. There are things in life you can't control. As DaVinci said, Once man has flown, he will walk the earth with his eyes turned skyward, for there he has been, and there he will wish to return.
and then the conversation returned to normal.
Of course, I'm not sure if that quote is exact. I am fairly sure DaVinci said it, though.
But I think I can really identify with that quote. I lived in Canada, and then I came here. It kinda was like comparing flying to walking on the ground. And, well, it's not like I could walk around facing north all the time, but I thought about it a lot.
And now, whenever I pass my old English classroom (and it's my homeroom) I think if how, damnit, I used to have a friend in that class. And the teacher is funny. And really lax. No fair. Why do I have to suffer like this? I hate being alone. And it's so stressful. I have all this work, and lousy classmates, and no friend to vent to. I bet all my hair'll turn grey, I'll have to buy a wig.
And I kinda thought that "will walk the earth with his eyes turned skyward" part a bit sad.
So, he doesn't get to fly again? Is he cursed to walk on the ground forever, always thinking about that freedom and joy he tasted flying?
Then wouldn't it just be better to forget about it?
But then you'd be losing something precious to you...
But it's still nice to think about it.
I can't imagine anything being very "nice" if all it does is make you depressed.
Guah, all of a sudden, this became a bit depressing....
Anyway, yeah,
HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!
Look! It's a rainbow!
Anyway, let's all have a great weekend, and hopefully I will be able to sell ads!
03 September 2010
It's FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And there's no school on Monday!!!!!!!!!!!
I should be really, really, really excited, but I'm o tired..... guah... and I have a ton of homework.... I mean, it's not all due next week, but it feels like so much...
And all my teachers seem to be loving group projects because almost all of my 6 weeks tasks are group projects. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.
__________________
My friends keep bothering me to put my drawings on Deviant Art. I keep saying no, but they keep insisting. And I keep insisting that I won't, but they keep insisting that I do. It's awful. Why do they want me to put up my artwork anyway? They've already seen it. No need to let the rest of the world see it. Really, I do not want to give the whole internet world access to my awful scratchwork.
That's really all it is. It's something to keep my hands busy. It's easy, and doesn't require much effort or thought. I just draw to have something to do. They really have no meaning. They're just there. And they're happy just being there. There are enough artists who upload their work anyway. If I were to take a career in art, then, sure, I'd do it. But I'm not. Not drawing art. Literary art.
And my friend got angry at me for saying that. Why am I not allowed to be honest? She also got pissed when I refused to obsess-- no, when I refused to be more dedicated to Sebastian from Kuroshitsuji. Jeez.
______________________
I cleaned my room for the first time in months.
I am tired. Really, really, really tired.
But my room is clean!
I'd forgotten there was an actual floor below my desk.
It's covered with carpet and everything! Amazing, right?
Anyway, I am really, really tired right now, so I'm not gonna expend the effort to write another long-ass post. I'm sorry.
But, hey, it's less shit for you to read.
I'm so tired............... *dies*
01 September 2010
In which I... do nothing, really... Just more long-winded ramblings... -.-
Oh, wow, September already...
*sigh*
Wednesday.
Almost over.
And then it'll be Thursday.
And then Friday
and then the weekend!!!!!!!
And then monday and I have to go back to hel-- school again.
I decided to use a planner for school there are so many assignments and due dates and deadlines. It has a section for internet resources, geography, and science/math. I kinda wish it had an address book as well, but ah well.
And in the front, for personal information, under "address" of school, I wrote Hell.
Yeah, not particularly creative, but it's sarcastic, and I bet at least one of you laughed. (You did, right? Right?)
In the science section, there's a guide for the human skeleton. And the thing's resting on a shovel. It kinda makes me think... Wow... did it just... dig itself out of its own grave? o.o
I really don't know why I decided to post... but last month, I was one post away from beating the record for most posts this year, 16, in June, And in August. And the post that would have pushed me over somehow wasn't published...I clicked the button, I know I did. But it still came up under "draft"
Cuz I didn't feel like publishing it after so much time, I deleted it.
There was nothing important in there anyway, just more inconsequential rambling.
I think.
I'm really not sure.
It was pretty old, so I just deleted it without really looking at it.. o.o
Anyway, my all time record is for December of 09. 29 posts, meaning I posted every day except for two days. Ahahaha.
But that doesn't mean I'd just go and do three posts a day to make a record.
No, my posts much have a point!
But then you just rendered your entire blog as unworthy of being posted.
Shut up.
And in April of 09, I only did one post.
Heh....
So, I guess this post somehow turned into me rambling about how many times I post a month?
On average, I post nine times a month.
Actually, my calculator said 9.363636363636364 but you get what I mean.
I say nine because, well, you can't have half a post.
Au contraire!
Great, now he's using French. (By the way, I've been trying to find Death Note subbed in French, but I cannot find it anywhere. Light's laugh in the French version sounds so... guah...)
Anyway, you can't possibly be trying to tell us that every bit pointless drivel you force down your reader's throats can actually count as a real, proper post, can you? They could only count as a third of a post at best. Don't be so cocky, you third-rate writer!!
Aw, listen to that harsh, unforgiving tone! I'm so proud!
Hey!
Don't steal my role!!
*Ahem*, before the two of you start bickering like children--
Shut up! You are a child! You're more childish than the imaginary friends you made up to make this blog more interesting!
Gasp!!
*long moment of silence as the shock settles in*
He... he just...
HE JUST TOLD ME TO SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *cries*
Look what you did! You made it cry!
Huh?! What?! No! It's not my fault! I didn't do anything to it!!
And now they're calling me "it"!!!!!
Oh, the pain one feels when one's own creations turn on one!!
Oh, the pain! The sadness!
Oh, suck it up.
Be a man!
But first, you might want to first be a human!
Oi
That was almost cheesy.
but it still hurt.
That's right! It hurts right here!
*thumps chest*
Ow....
Readers, am I scaring you?
I hope I'm not.
Though, I've probably scared you enough already...
So you should be used to it!
Except for my newest followers.
They are not yet immune.
Yes.
There is time to train them...
Just kidding!
Or am I?? *dramatic bulgy-eyed look* *lightening*
Anyway!
Oh, wow, I wrote this much already...
Oh, yeah!
I finished reading The Stranger by Albert Camus!
And, it turns out, it does have the word "absurd" in there.
But once.
Only once.
'Tis forgivable, cuz it's still an awesome book.
And I think I'm going to read it next year (I'm in 10th grade now)
Cuz a senior (I'm assuming she's a senior. She asked if she could call me Asian Girl. I said. I am indeed Asian, and last time I checked, I am a girl. But I probably won't respond. There are lots of Asian girls in this world) asked me if I was a junior when she saw that I had that book.
"No," I said in a flat tone.
"Then why're you reading this?"
Her loud outburst makes me taken aback. "Uh... it's a good book...?" I answer nervously, hoping that in answering, some huge foreign object would not come falling out of the sky and crush me where I stood. (Unless it was a magical huge foreign object that could magically GIVE ME MY OLD SCHEDULE BACK!!! I HATE MY SCHOOL!!! IF ANYTHING SHOULD BE CRUSHD BY A HUGE OBJECT, IT SHOULD BE THAT SCHOOL!!!!!! And yes, I am very aware that almost every other high schooler thinks the same. But, hey, it's within my rights. Freedom of speech. First Amendment. It is in my right to bitch as much as I want about a topic as inane as I want. So ha. Take that.)
Why are you being so unreasonable?
Shut up. I've been in a bad mood since yesterday.
Noo! Really? I could never have guessed!!
Look what you did! He's all sarcastic now!! YOU WENT AND BROKE *LAUGH* GUY!!!
Oh, shut up. He's always been sarcastic. That's his job, to sarcastically play recorded laughter at all your lame jokes.
Oh...
*laugh*
Shut up.
*aw....*
Grrr...
Anyway, another senior told me that she read it last year for English. And they had to annotate it.
But I ain't writing in that book! The thing's for reading, not for writing on! That's what notebooks and blackboards (who the hell uses those anymore?) (shut up, me) and walls are for!
But since we got it at Half Price Books, there already were a few markings on it.
There weren't that many, so it was fine.
BUT I REFUSE TO WRITE IN THAT BOOK!!!!
Heh, and I wrote even more on nothing.
It's almost amazing.
I click "new post" on my blogger dashboard and I start typing something, i digress from whatever the hell I'd wanted to talk about, even before I was anywhere near making my point, and then I remember something, and then I keep typing and typing and typing and typing, and voila!
A post!
Ohh, it's long! I'll publish it!
And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, is how I write a post for this blog.
As you see, no thought goes into these things whatsoever.
Even if I'm writing a narrative, they're all kind of mindless.
(and after finishing the Stranger, I kinda felt like the book was pointless... It was... is a very nice book, but just... kinda... pointless....)
But I like things that are mindless. Cynical and a bit mindless. I like that.
Where did "the only cure for stupidity is death" come from? I rather like that quote. (rather?) Shut up.
But I think it's true.
I am an idiot.
I have always been an idiot.
I will always be an idiot.
Hopefully, though, when I die, I will be less of an idiot so less people will make fun of me.
Wow, this is one of the longest posts I've written in a while.
How many of you guys actually read all this?
Seriously.
It kinda feels like when a teacher goes out, so they have a sub, and the teacher assigned some kind of packet or test. And then you go and actually do the assignment, only to find out later that you never really had to do it in the first place because it was all just busy work and it didn't even count for a grade.
This happened a lot in geometry last year.
The teacher still owes my class donuts.
Aah, donuts...
Damnit, I want donuts now.
Oh, yeah!
AAA sent us cookies a while ago as a thank you gift for staying with the company or something.
(What, did you really think I'd end there? No way! I'm on a roll! And I wonder if people still say that)
Guess how long a while ago was.
Two months.
Two months ago, they sent us cookies and we didn't get them til now cuz the post office never sent my mother anything to tell her that there was a package for her.
And she told me to wait until my father came home, cuz she's not sure if the cookies are okay or not.
but they're cookies.
With chocolate.
Damnit I want--
Oh, we have chocolate!
*Will eat chocolate once done with this post!!*
Oh, a friend (would I call you a friend?) told me about this a while ago.
Go clicky! It's very funny.
http://outpostnine.com/editorials/teacher1.html
To go to the next one, you just go to the bottom and click on the link there.
I really like it.
Thank you, Devan Moss for telling me about this.
Since I'm not allowed to watch anime for a month I read that while eating dinner, and half the time I choke on my food cuz I'm laughing so hard... so sad... (All I did was neglect to print something until the morning!! WHY A MONTH???? [she might let you off for good behavior] If she ever does that, it's usually just one day before the end! And she never lets off for good bahavior!!!!!!!!)
Anyway, CLICK!!!
*sigh*
Wednesday.
Almost over.
And then it'll be Thursday.
And then Friday
and then the weekend!!!!!!!
And then monday and I have to go back to hel-- school again.
I decided to use a planner for school there are so many assignments and due dates and deadlines. It has a section for internet resources, geography, and science/math. I kinda wish it had an address book as well, but ah well.
And in the front, for personal information, under "address" of school, I wrote Hell.
Yeah, not particularly creative, but it's sarcastic, and I bet at least one of you laughed. (You did, right? Right?)
In the science section, there's a guide for the human skeleton. And the thing's resting on a shovel. It kinda makes me think... Wow... did it just... dig itself out of its own grave? o.o
I really don't know why I decided to post... but last month, I was one post away from beating the record for most posts this year, 16, in June, And in August. And the post that would have pushed me over somehow wasn't published...I clicked the button, I know I did. But it still came up under "draft"
Cuz I didn't feel like publishing it after so much time, I deleted it.
There was nothing important in there anyway, just more inconsequential rambling.
I think.
I'm really not sure.
It was pretty old, so I just deleted it without really looking at it.. o.o
Anyway, my all time record is for December of 09. 29 posts, meaning I posted every day except for two days. Ahahaha.
But that doesn't mean I'd just go and do three posts a day to make a record.
No, my posts much have a point!
But then you just rendered your entire blog as unworthy of being posted.
Shut up.
And in April of 09, I only did one post.
Heh....
So, I guess this post somehow turned into me rambling about how many times I post a month?
On average, I post nine times a month.
Actually, my calculator said 9.363636363636364 but you get what I mean.
I say nine because, well, you can't have half a post.
Au contraire!
Great, now he's using French. (By the way, I've been trying to find Death Note subbed in French, but I cannot find it anywhere. Light's laugh in the French version sounds so... guah...)
Anyway, you can't possibly be trying to tell us that every bit pointless drivel you force down your reader's throats can actually count as a real, proper post, can you? They could only count as a third of a post at best. Don't be so cocky, you third-rate writer!!
Aw, listen to that harsh, unforgiving tone! I'm so proud!
Hey!
Don't steal my role!!
*Ahem*, before the two of you start bickering like children--
Shut up! You are a child! You're more childish than the imaginary friends you made up to make this blog more interesting!
Gasp!!
*long moment of silence as the shock settles in*
He... he just...
HE JUST TOLD ME TO SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *cries*
Look what you did! You made it cry!
Huh?! What?! No! It's not my fault! I didn't do anything to it!!
And now they're calling me "it"!!!!!
Oh, the pain one feels when one's own creations turn on one!!
Oh, the pain! The sadness!
Oh, suck it up.
Be a man!
But first, you might want to first be a human!
Oi
That was almost cheesy.
but it still hurt.
That's right! It hurts right here!
*thumps chest*
Ow....
Readers, am I scaring you?
I hope I'm not.
Though, I've probably scared you enough already...
So you should be used to it!
Except for my newest followers.
They are not yet immune.
Yes.
There is time to train them...
Just kidding!
Or am I?? *dramatic bulgy-eyed look* *lightening*
Anyway!
Oh, wow, I wrote this much already...
Oh, yeah!
I finished reading The Stranger by Albert Camus!
And, it turns out, it does have the word "absurd" in there.
But once.
Only once.
'Tis forgivable, cuz it's still an awesome book.
And I think I'm going to read it next year (I'm in 10th grade now)
Cuz a senior (I'm assuming she's a senior. She asked if she could call me Asian Girl. I said. I am indeed Asian, and last time I checked, I am a girl. But I probably won't respond. There are lots of Asian girls in this world) asked me if I was a junior when she saw that I had that book.
"No," I said in a flat tone.
"Then why're you reading this?"
Her loud outburst makes me taken aback. "Uh... it's a good book...?" I answer nervously, hoping that in answering, some huge foreign object would not come falling out of the sky and crush me where I stood. (Unless it was a magical huge foreign object that could magically GIVE ME MY OLD SCHEDULE BACK!!! I HATE MY SCHOOL!!! IF ANYTHING SHOULD BE CRUSHD BY A HUGE OBJECT, IT SHOULD BE THAT SCHOOL!!!!!! And yes, I am very aware that almost every other high schooler thinks the same. But, hey, it's within my rights. Freedom of speech. First Amendment. It is in my right to bitch as much as I want about a topic as inane as I want. So ha. Take that.)
Why are you being so unreasonable?
Shut up. I've been in a bad mood since yesterday.
Noo! Really? I could never have guessed!!
Look what you did! He's all sarcastic now!! YOU WENT AND BROKE *LAUGH* GUY!!!
Oh, shut up. He's always been sarcastic. That's his job, to sarcastically play recorded laughter at all your lame jokes.
Oh...
*laugh*
Shut up.
*aw....*
Grrr...
Anyway, another senior told me that she read it last year for English. And they had to annotate it.
But I ain't writing in that book! The thing's for reading, not for writing on! That's what notebooks and blackboards (who the hell uses those anymore?) (shut up, me) and walls are for!
But since we got it at Half Price Books, there already were a few markings on it.
There weren't that many, so it was fine.
BUT I REFUSE TO WRITE IN THAT BOOK!!!!
Heh, and I wrote even more on nothing.
It's almost amazing.
I click "new post" on my blogger dashboard and I start typing something, i digress from whatever the hell I'd wanted to talk about, even before I was anywhere near making my point, and then I remember something, and then I keep typing and typing and typing and typing, and voila!
A post!
Ohh, it's long! I'll publish it!
And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, is how I write a post for this blog.
As you see, no thought goes into these things whatsoever.
Even if I'm writing a narrative, they're all kind of mindless.
(and after finishing the Stranger, I kinda felt like the book was pointless... It was... is a very nice book, but just... kinda... pointless....)
But I like things that are mindless. Cynical and a bit mindless. I like that.
Where did "the only cure for stupidity is death" come from? I rather like that quote. (rather?) Shut up.
But I think it's true.
I am an idiot.
I have always been an idiot.
I will always be an idiot.
Hopefully, though, when I die, I will be less of an idiot so less people will make fun of me.
Wow, this is one of the longest posts I've written in a while.
How many of you guys actually read all this?
Seriously.
It kinda feels like when a teacher goes out, so they have a sub, and the teacher assigned some kind of packet or test. And then you go and actually do the assignment, only to find out later that you never really had to do it in the first place because it was all just busy work and it didn't even count for a grade.
This happened a lot in geometry last year.
The teacher still owes my class donuts.
Aah, donuts...
Damnit, I want donuts now.
Oh, yeah!
AAA sent us cookies a while ago as a thank you gift for staying with the company or something.
(What, did you really think I'd end there? No way! I'm on a roll! And I wonder if people still say that)
Guess how long a while ago was.
Two months.
Two months ago, they sent us cookies and we didn't get them til now cuz the post office never sent my mother anything to tell her that there was a package for her.
And she told me to wait until my father came home, cuz she's not sure if the cookies are okay or not.
but they're cookies.
With chocolate.
Damnit I want--
Oh, we have chocolate!
*Will eat chocolate once done with this post!!*
Oh, a friend (would I call you a friend?) told me about this a while ago.
Go clicky! It's very funny.
http://outpostnine.com/editorials/teacher1.html
To go to the next one, you just go to the bottom and click on the link there.
I really like it.
Thank you, Devan Moss for telling me about this.
Since I'm not allowed to watch anime for a month I read that while eating dinner, and half the time I choke on my food cuz I'm laughing so hard... so sad... (All I did was neglect to print something until the morning!! WHY A MONTH???? [she might let you off for good behavior] If she ever does that, it's usually just one day before the end! And she never lets off for good bahavior!!!!!!!!)
Anyway, CLICK!!!
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